Thoughts of Starting Over

More on looking for love...cont from 11.22.17 http://rightsizeandrethink.blogspot.com/2017/11/looking-for-love-is-like-gambling.html

 

3 years later as I was still reeling from my last relationship fiasco, I went on a motorcycle ride with some friends.  I had never ridden on a Harley Davidson and my friend offered to get me out in the sunshine and he said it would be fun.  So I went. 

 

The bikes were so large and shiney...and loud!  I rode with my friend and we all met up at a gas station to get started.  It was mid June and not too hot.  I wore the only leather jacket I had and some boots and borrowed a helmet.  It was early morning and the sun was out.  I knew several of the people riding and met a few I did not know.  There was a group of about 8 bikes.  My friend was towards the end of the group as we all pulled out, staggering side by side.  The feeling of the wind and the sun was amazing, the sound is one I will never forget.  As we accelerated up to speed to get on the highway, it was sheer adrenaline!  The way people looked at the bikes going by and little kids waived, it was like being in a parade - only I was on the float!  It was so much fun.  We actually went to see a friends' new grandbaby that day.  One of the guys in the group had a new grandbaby boy, so we tagged along to see the baby.  As we got on the elevator in our biker boots and gear, one of the guys joked "biker trash".  I felt like I belonged somewhere.  Like I was one of the group.  While we visited the new grandbaby, I talked music with one of  the guys who rode with us, whom I had met that morning.  I noticed him towards the front of the group as we rode, he had a big shiney green Harley with loud pipes.  I also noticed how handsome he was when he smiled.  As we talked, I could tell that he thought I was cute too.  It felt good to know that just because I had been involved in a horrible relationship with much dysfunction, I could still be attracted to someone.  That my life was not over.  It did not even occur to me that someone could be attracted to me.  It just felt good to know that I still had a lot of life left ahead of me.  I was the ripe old age of 38.  I felt like I could face my obstacles head on and look forward to whatever was still out there waiting for me.