This story is similar to my story yesterday, in that it involved an interaction on the highway with a complete stranger. The differences might be very different, or they might not be that different. It is weird...
So a few years later, things are very different for my life. I lived in a different state and I was a bit older, maybe a year, maybe 2 years. But I was driving from my state (I lived in a dry county) to the neighboring state to buy alcohol. I was driving my black Camaro. It was warm, but not hot and it was the weekend, probably Saturday and probably morning-ish.
I had driven to Missouri to buy alcohol for a quiet evening with some friends. I was now a widow, but seeing someone else. I was young still, 28 or so. After my late husband, SCG, passed away I wasted no time. I wanted to quiet the quiet, sad loneliness. So, I started dating within a year (big mistake) with someone I knew from a prior life (bigger mistake?). I only explain this, because it makes a little sense understanding my thought process - well, I KNEW him.
Anyway, I was driving by myself. I know this time I had the windows open because my car was black, it was sunny and even in the spring this car was hot! Because I had no air conditioning in it and because when you drove anywhere, it would heat up and make the entire car hot! Haha, the fun things we do when we are young. But it was a Camaro! Score! Goodbye new import 4 cylinder with working AC and sunroof and automatic transmission.
OK, back to my story...so I had been to the store about 15-20 min from my house and was on my way back. Well, I notice a motorcycle. I don't know how...like if I came up behind him, or vice versa. The motorcycle and I each see one another because one passes the other (I don't remember as clearly as the Alabama car/car story). A LOT had happened in that year/year and a half. So, the motorcycle rider is a male. I don't remember if he wore a helmet, etc. I also had a motorcycle then, but I was just learning and I had never ridden it on the highway. So, I noticed motorcycles...and cars. I was raised a tom-boy - more on that some day.
Anyway, the motorcycle rider is in front of me in the same lane. We are on a 2 lane road, the main highway south from Missouri into Arkansas (540?). He slows down, way down. I move to the left lane and go around without fanfare. He passed me again. He gets over into the right lane in front of me again. He slows down again.
This goes on. It turned from being amusing. To being weird. I was not in fear, but I was confused and not sure what do to. He goes by one last time and I will never forget this - he hits the hood of my car with his hand! Not hard, just smacks it. While he is smiling and looking at me. Well, that was really too much for me. I just wanted to get home now.
So, I recalled the guy in the car in Alabama...and decided just what to do...
At the next exit, which would have been an exit to Rogers. I let the guy get in front of me and I watch the timing with the exit...I pause...I slow...and just as he gets to the point where he could not take the exit, I go right quickly! And I get the end of the off ramp, looking to see if I can see him up ahead and do not, and I turn left. Just for good measure, I take a circuitous route home.
I was not threatened or shook up. Just weirded out. And this was easily 25 years ago. Today I would probably freak out. I also just gave up my age. Oh well. I like the saying about having a past that is not so boring that you have some stories in your old age. And I am quickly on my way to old age!
Friday, August 31, 2018
Thursday, August 30, 2018
Stories from the Vault
I was driving from Huntsville, Alabama to the gulf once upon a time back in the 90's. I lived in Alabama. It was a warm June day, early on a Friday morning. I had taken the day off to have a long weekend. I was meeting a couple other gals for a weekend at the beach. I was a recent widow. I had not taken off my wedding ring yet. I was not ready.
The women I were meeting were also widows, not much older than myself. They both worked for the same company that I did. One woman was about 15 years my senior. Her husband had been a doctor. He performed some procedures that were controversial, still are. He was murdered by a protestor. This was several years prior. The other woman was just a few years older than myself. Her husband had taken his own life, this was a couple years prior. I was 26 years old. They had suggested I come down and go to the beach with them for a long weekend. I suspect now that my boss, BMc, at the time had encouraged this. More about him another time. He was a special guy, a great boss, a mentor I will never forget.
The sun was up in the sky, high enough to start getting warm. I still had my windows and my sunroof open, delaying closing them and turning on the AC until I just could not stand the humidity. I had packed a hat to keep the sun off my face while I was at the beach. I had it on in the car so that my long hair was not blowing so much it would get tangled. I had my favorite pair of Ray Bans on. My late husband, SCG, had introduced me to them. He loved his Wayfarers. I would have never considered spending so much money on a pair of sunglasses, but he wanted to treat me. I loved how sturdy and solid they felt. The polarized lenses brightened up the sky surrounding the sun in a way I have never seen with my cheaper versions.
I shared the road with a large black car, but did not notice much other traffic. I think it was mid morning on a Friday, so few other cars. I first noticed the car come up behind me in my lane, also going south on I-65. I was in the right lane. The car came up behind me and followed me for a while. After a few minutes, the car pulled over into the left lane and slowly made it's way up next to my car. I noticed in my side mirror, the sun reflect off the shiny car. Seeing the luxury model, I glanced over to admire it. I love cars. My eyes met the eyes of the other driver. We looked at each other for a second. I realized it was a fairly handsome man dressed in a suit. We held eye contact for a second. He went on around me and I admired the beautiful black Cadillac. I enjoyed hearing the throaty V8 exhaust sound as it passed. I usually drive about 5 over the speed limit. I used to drive faster. I used to have one, maybe two radar detectors. My radar detectors were silent. I noticed the man in the Cadillac also had a radar detector. Maybe he drove a lot too.
I had gotten one free and bought the other, expensive gadget a couple years earlier. My mother was ill and dying 600+ miles away in another state and I drove home once a month to see her. I did not speed carelessly, but I did push it just a little late on Friday's on the barren wide open interstate when I would leave work early to get back to my hometown by midnight to spend as much time as I could with my mother. So, my late husband and I decided to get the $300 radar detector to save me delay and tickets.
The black Cadillac moved over into the right lane up ahead of me. The car's speed adjusted to just about what my speed was. I stayed behind and followed along, enjoying the sunshine, the wind and my radio. I was looking forward to seeing the ocean. I kept correcting myself with a chuckle - my late husband always corrected me - the Gulf, he would say. To me, it was as breath taking as any ocean view. So I always called it the ocean.
The first time I ever saw a beach. Years earlier, he took me for my first trip to Florida. I was 22. I will never forget the feeling of awe I had toward it. And toward him. I loved the sound of the waves crashing on the beach, the sunrise and sunsets, the palm trees, the salt spray, the beautiful white sand beaches of the Gulf coast.
This visit was my first time back to the beach since he had died. I had some mixed feelings, but I was trying to focus on the good feelings. The happy memories. I was trying hard not to think about the shock of his death, or the painful journey we had as he discovered his illness, received his diagnosis, began his treatment. There were many beautiful things for me to consider. How he worried about me while he lay in his hospital bed. How he sent me flowers for Valentines Day while he was still in the hospital. He had arranged it weeks before he went to the hospital and had even furnished a hand written card to the florist shop...all in preparation of him being in the hospital for months for a transplant. How he insisted he come home for my birthday, even though the doctors told him it was too soon. How he fell while he was home during my birthday and had to go back to the hospital. How I was torn between trying to work full time, and drive 90 miles one way twice a week to be with him, all while caring for our Golden Retriever, Sunny. How S had bought Sunny as a puppy for me on the first Mother's Day after my mother had died. This was my reverie now. Maybe I was a little distracted, maybe I was feeling wistful at how happy I still could feel about the beach now. About anything. I still kept my attention on the road and on the car in front of me. I soon realized we were almost to Birmingham.
I was stopping in Birmingham to have my car serviced. I was concerned about one of my gauges. So, I decided when I left Huntsville I better have it checked out before the rest of my drive to Florida. I cannot recall who turned on their blinker first, him or me. But we both exited the first main exit to Birmingham.
I pulled up to the stop sign to turn left, back under the interstate to the Acura dealer I could see from the highway. The man in the Cadillac was in the lane to turn right. He rolled his driver side window down and gestured to me. I rolled my passenger side window down. He smiled, a good looking man. He was older than me. I smiled a small smile back, I did not want to be rude, but I did not want to flirt either. He laughed and said he noticed me a ways back on the highway and knew it was crazy, but would I want to have lunch with him. I laughed back and said as tempting as it was, I could not do that. I held up my hand and showed him my wedding ring and laughed saying "I am married, but thank you". He smiled and waived, pulling out to go West and I pulled out and drove East.
The women I were meeting were also widows, not much older than myself. They both worked for the same company that I did. One woman was about 15 years my senior. Her husband had been a doctor. He performed some procedures that were controversial, still are. He was murdered by a protestor. This was several years prior. The other woman was just a few years older than myself. Her husband had taken his own life, this was a couple years prior. I was 26 years old. They had suggested I come down and go to the beach with them for a long weekend. I suspect now that my boss, BMc, at the time had encouraged this. More about him another time. He was a special guy, a great boss, a mentor I will never forget.
The sun was up in the sky, high enough to start getting warm. I still had my windows and my sunroof open, delaying closing them and turning on the AC until I just could not stand the humidity. I had packed a hat to keep the sun off my face while I was at the beach. I had it on in the car so that my long hair was not blowing so much it would get tangled. I had my favorite pair of Ray Bans on. My late husband, SCG, had introduced me to them. He loved his Wayfarers. I would have never considered spending so much money on a pair of sunglasses, but he wanted to treat me. I loved how sturdy and solid they felt. The polarized lenses brightened up the sky surrounding the sun in a way I have never seen with my cheaper versions.
I shared the road with a large black car, but did not notice much other traffic. I think it was mid morning on a Friday, so few other cars. I first noticed the car come up behind me in my lane, also going south on I-65. I was in the right lane. The car came up behind me and followed me for a while. After a few minutes, the car pulled over into the left lane and slowly made it's way up next to my car. I noticed in my side mirror, the sun reflect off the shiny car. Seeing the luxury model, I glanced over to admire it. I love cars. My eyes met the eyes of the other driver. We looked at each other for a second. I realized it was a fairly handsome man dressed in a suit. We held eye contact for a second. He went on around me and I admired the beautiful black Cadillac. I enjoyed hearing the throaty V8 exhaust sound as it passed. I usually drive about 5 over the speed limit. I used to drive faster. I used to have one, maybe two radar detectors. My radar detectors were silent. I noticed the man in the Cadillac also had a radar detector. Maybe he drove a lot too.
I had gotten one free and bought the other, expensive gadget a couple years earlier. My mother was ill and dying 600+ miles away in another state and I drove home once a month to see her. I did not speed carelessly, but I did push it just a little late on Friday's on the barren wide open interstate when I would leave work early to get back to my hometown by midnight to spend as much time as I could with my mother. So, my late husband and I decided to get the $300 radar detector to save me delay and tickets.
The black Cadillac moved over into the right lane up ahead of me. The car's speed adjusted to just about what my speed was. I stayed behind and followed along, enjoying the sunshine, the wind and my radio. I was looking forward to seeing the ocean. I kept correcting myself with a chuckle - my late husband always corrected me - the Gulf, he would say. To me, it was as breath taking as any ocean view. So I always called it the ocean.
The first time I ever saw a beach. Years earlier, he took me for my first trip to Florida. I was 22. I will never forget the feeling of awe I had toward it. And toward him. I loved the sound of the waves crashing on the beach, the sunrise and sunsets, the palm trees, the salt spray, the beautiful white sand beaches of the Gulf coast.
This visit was my first time back to the beach since he had died. I had some mixed feelings, but I was trying to focus on the good feelings. The happy memories. I was trying hard not to think about the shock of his death, or the painful journey we had as he discovered his illness, received his diagnosis, began his treatment. There were many beautiful things for me to consider. How he worried about me while he lay in his hospital bed. How he sent me flowers for Valentines Day while he was still in the hospital. He had arranged it weeks before he went to the hospital and had even furnished a hand written card to the florist shop...all in preparation of him being in the hospital for months for a transplant. How he insisted he come home for my birthday, even though the doctors told him it was too soon. How he fell while he was home during my birthday and had to go back to the hospital. How I was torn between trying to work full time, and drive 90 miles one way twice a week to be with him, all while caring for our Golden Retriever, Sunny. How S had bought Sunny as a puppy for me on the first Mother's Day after my mother had died. This was my reverie now. Maybe I was a little distracted, maybe I was feeling wistful at how happy I still could feel about the beach now. About anything. I still kept my attention on the road and on the car in front of me. I soon realized we were almost to Birmingham.
I was stopping in Birmingham to have my car serviced. I was concerned about one of my gauges. So, I decided when I left Huntsville I better have it checked out before the rest of my drive to Florida. I cannot recall who turned on their blinker first, him or me. But we both exited the first main exit to Birmingham.
I pulled up to the stop sign to turn left, back under the interstate to the Acura dealer I could see from the highway. The man in the Cadillac was in the lane to turn right. He rolled his driver side window down and gestured to me. I rolled my passenger side window down. He smiled, a good looking man. He was older than me. I smiled a small smile back, I did not want to be rude, but I did not want to flirt either. He laughed and said he noticed me a ways back on the highway and knew it was crazy, but would I want to have lunch with him. I laughed back and said as tempting as it was, I could not do that. I held up my hand and showed him my wedding ring and laughed saying "I am married, but thank you". He smiled and waived, pulling out to go West and I pulled out and drove East.
Wednesday, August 29, 2018
Stories from the Vault - Postponed
I referenced a couple of stories about my experience with strangers while driving - 2 of them I can think of off the top of my head. I will write about them tomorrow.
Today, I want to write about 2 families on my mind...I posted a LONG post. Then came back and curated considerably.
Relative with stage 4 cancer diagnosis. She is doing amazing. Mass in her lung is gone, as are the other tumors in liver, lymph nodes and couple other places. It is a miracle!
She can barely breathe, so tenuous her understanding and comprehension. She says she will celebrate at her 1 year mark...So amazing.
On the other hand...her son is in his 20's. Did not know his father. He is very smart, but just no "gumption".
Relative had some issues in her life, she will be the first to admit. But she always worked hard. She had a great father. At one point she was very successful in her career, making over 6 figures. But after some relationship issues, a big geographic move and some job insecurity...ended up essentially scraping by job to job, no savings left, and barely kept her house, which is pretty run down and too big for her to properly care for.
Well, when she got ill. Her family has tried to be supportive. We all tried to be there for her and J her son. We all tried to gently comfort J while simultaneously encouraging him to "man up", the brothers tried to mentor him. The problem is...we are all located distantly, busy working/caring for our families and have not been around him enough to naturally foster such personal relationships. It is hard to "start" now from many miles away. Any ideas?
At one point, she even encouraged us via group text to not let him feel abandonded, should she die. I have tried a couple of times, not really knowing what to do and not getting any response in return. What can I do now? I admit, I feel distant partly because I just don't respect his bad choices. But I do sincerely pray for and want the best for them both.
Well, evidently now the son and his mother had a falling out. She explained that after he left in a hurry, she inspected his room and found it covered in trash. Items she found troubling. She even texted me pictures - it was shocking to me. Mom wants to sell this house that is too big and get moved into a smaller place but she worries about J. J meanwhile is just piling trash in his room and not helping enough. I told her (gently and with great emphasis on the disclaimer) - I HAVE NO CHILDREN - that she needs to cut the cord for his own good too.
So, clearly this guy has issues...it is really sad.
Another sort of related topic...I have a family member whose husband was in a bad car accident recently. Likely his fault, their only car. He is similar in affect to J, smart and wants to tell you how smart he is, sort of anti society. Well he was hurt badly. I think the passenger and the other driver are OK.
Many issues about accident I wont go into...What if S and JD have no money saved up for emergencies? Oh, these poor choices. These 2 examples are not isolated...it is sad and scary.
Lord if someone is hurting today, please visit them and embrace and comfort them. Amen.
Did I mention that neither J or JD have any spirituality - no experience in nature, no meditation/solitude, no exercise, no artistic outlet. No humility, I guess. I think my gumption came from humility, which unfortunately came from humiliation - my father's way of cultivating obedience. But does it have to come from there? Do we have to feel small before we can see the big picture?
Tuesday, August 28, 2018
Caution
I saw a social media post about a jogger who was followed by a man in a car. I have seen quite a few of these lately, usually in rural Midwest, small county roads - women in cars followed by men in cars. Supposedly single females being followed by single men in cars with no licence plates. The men in cars engaging in strange behavior, such as photographing the women, passing them, then slowing down to be passed, then repeating. This happened to me couple times when I was a young woman. Maybe I will write about them tomorrow.
I have seen posts in the past about walkers and joggers being followed, over the past few years. I wish I could point to some national story that might have been the inspiration...There have been some national news stories about this. A woman in California taken and then later she escaped. Several stories about joggers back East.
Then this post I saw last night. This post was in my old neighborhood of our city house. This is the 2nd such incident in 2 months in this same 2 block area. There was a local news story last night about this woman who did the social media post. She reports that a man in an SUV was parked and when she jogged by, he drove down and cut through at a turn and came up the side she was jogging on. By then, she joined another jogger and the SUV then left.
I walk there still while we are in extended stay hotel. The hotel is on an outer road with no shoulder, so I felt it was too dangerous to walk near the hotel. So, I have been driving over to my old neighborhood and walking. Now I am not so sure. I told DH the other day that I often see cars go by and then go by again, I thought not much about it. Now I have doubts. DH says he will walk with me after retirement. I guess I better have him join me now. But I cannot find anyone who wants to walk as much or as far as I do. And I will walk in hot or cold. Makes me sad. I really need my walks. Walking helps me get vitamin D, helps me stay trim and lets me eat what I want, helps me clear my mind, creates neurotransmitters, gives me solitude. If I keep walking, I will stop listening to my books, which is a big part of what I enjoyed. Guess I can't have it all.
When I walked last night, I also saw a vehicle stopped by a road that did not continue (like where you see the signs with red diamonds). The vehicle was running and there was a man sitting in it. DH said maybe the man was watching his wife jog - I did see several other women jogging. If DH won't/can't keep up with me - I guess I will just have to have him go with me and at least sit in his car and watch me. Crazy isn't it?!
I guess I may try to go to yoga tonight. It is worth the $15 per time. If I cannot walk outside, I just don't know what I would do. I guess in my little small town usa retirement town, I will walk laps around town instead of walking out in the middle of nowhere. But part of the appeal of where I walked here in the suburbs was seeing nature, birds, critters...etc.
I wonder if this is some sort of worry phenomenon or if there really is more young women being followed. This hysteria on the heels of the girl missing and then found dead in Iowa? What do you guys think? I do not walk without protection, I will just leave that at that. But I am still just a middle aged woman, no match for a strong man or men. It really makes me wonder.
I have seen posts in the past about walkers and joggers being followed, over the past few years. I wish I could point to some national story that might have been the inspiration...There have been some national news stories about this. A woman in California taken and then later she escaped. Several stories about joggers back East.
Then this post I saw last night. This post was in my old neighborhood of our city house. This is the 2nd such incident in 2 months in this same 2 block area. There was a local news story last night about this woman who did the social media post. She reports that a man in an SUV was parked and when she jogged by, he drove down and cut through at a turn and came up the side she was jogging on. By then, she joined another jogger and the SUV then left.
I walk there still while we are in extended stay hotel. The hotel is on an outer road with no shoulder, so I felt it was too dangerous to walk near the hotel. So, I have been driving over to my old neighborhood and walking. Now I am not so sure. I told DH the other day that I often see cars go by and then go by again, I thought not much about it. Now I have doubts. DH says he will walk with me after retirement. I guess I better have him join me now. But I cannot find anyone who wants to walk as much or as far as I do. And I will walk in hot or cold. Makes me sad. I really need my walks. Walking helps me get vitamin D, helps me stay trim and lets me eat what I want, helps me clear my mind, creates neurotransmitters, gives me solitude. If I keep walking, I will stop listening to my books, which is a big part of what I enjoyed. Guess I can't have it all.
When I walked last night, I also saw a vehicle stopped by a road that did not continue (like where you see the signs with red diamonds). The vehicle was running and there was a man sitting in it. DH said maybe the man was watching his wife jog - I did see several other women jogging. If DH won't/can't keep up with me - I guess I will just have to have him go with me and at least sit in his car and watch me. Crazy isn't it?!
I guess I may try to go to yoga tonight. It is worth the $15 per time. If I cannot walk outside, I just don't know what I would do. I guess in my little small town usa retirement town, I will walk laps around town instead of walking out in the middle of nowhere. But part of the appeal of where I walked here in the suburbs was seeing nature, birds, critters...etc.
I wonder if this is some sort of worry phenomenon or if there really is more young women being followed. This hysteria on the heels of the girl missing and then found dead in Iowa? What do you guys think? I do not walk without protection, I will just leave that at that. But I am still just a middle aged woman, no match for a strong man or men. It really makes me wonder.
Monday, August 27, 2018
Before and During
Kitchen lighting as it is now. I still have to wait to get my under cabinet lighting installed. The electricians are coming back Friday. DH and I going back down for Labor Day, but we had not intended to take another Friday off work, so MIL and FIL will let electricians in Friday and they have a check to pay them, if they are finished before we get there 5ish.
Here are couple photos. 
At the top, slightly left of center, you can see the one of the old can lights. They have plastic trim rings which have turned dingy gold yellow. We replaced the trim rings for $5/a piece and LED bulbs for $8 each and there were 5 of them. They are so much brighter now!
We took down the old pendant over the sink and put brass pendants. They are full size, with clear globes. We thought they would look cool with the old time looking bulbs. They are not terribly bright, but the can lights are, plus we will have LED strings under all the cabinets, including the range hood and they will be on single wall switch, so I can just flip them on easily. Should really help brighten up my workspace.
The walls in the kitchen were a light dingy pink, original from 1996 or 97. I painted them a warm gray which contrasted nice with the white cabinets, but does darken even more. So, the lighting is a big deal in the kitchen. They brighter flooring (that we had not planned on, LOL) helps brighten it up too.
We also took a can light out and added a pendant over the breakfast nook table and wired it separately, so we can sit there with just some nice ambient light if we want.
I just love them. Someday if we need really bright lights, we can switch out for traditional LED lights and have up to 100 watts in each pendant.
Well, back to work this morning. Gotta pay for all this. Hope you have a great Monday!
At the top, slightly left of center, you can see the one of the old can lights. They have plastic trim rings which have turned dingy gold yellow. We replaced the trim rings for $5/a piece and LED bulbs for $8 each and there were 5 of them. They are so much brighter now!
We took down the old pendant over the sink and put brass pendants. They are full size, with clear globes. We thought they would look cool with the old time looking bulbs. They are not terribly bright, but the can lights are, plus we will have LED strings under all the cabinets, including the range hood and they will be on single wall switch, so I can just flip them on easily. Should really help brighten up my workspace.
The walls in the kitchen were a light dingy pink, original from 1996 or 97. I painted them a warm gray which contrasted nice with the white cabinets, but does darken even more. So, the lighting is a big deal in the kitchen. They brighter flooring (that we had not planned on, LOL) helps brighten it up too.
Well, back to work this morning. Gotta pay for all this. Hope you have a great Monday!
Sunday, August 26, 2018
Grain Moon
The Old Farmers Almanac gives the Native American names for each month's full moon. The Native Americans named them to track the seasons. Tonight is Grain Moon.
The corn here in the midwest is tall and close to harvest, but not quite ready. It is still green, so it is also known as The Green Corn Moon.
We spent some time admiring the corn as we drove home to the city to get in another week of work. We also have enjoyed seeing the moon this weekend. I came home and went to the store, grateful my food gathering is as easy as driving to a store. I can imagine for the Native Americans, it was time to gather as much as they could to both process and preserve it, along with the wild game they hunted to get ready for the fall and winter.
I walked after I fixed dinner and fixed lunches for Monday and Tues. I cut it close, sunset is now 8pm. Days start to get noticeably shorter now.
DH and I both had headaches this weekend, fatigue and aches and pains...sort of grouchy we both were. My back is also giving me fits making me think I need to tighten up my diet and get back to yoga soon. Native Americans and early settlers did a lot of physical labor and moving around. Today, our culture benefits from so much convenience, they we have come too far the other way. DH and I sit long hours at computers at our jobs. We need to keep moving. My 5 mile walk felt wonderful.
Going to bed, so my body can rest up. Happy Grain moon to you.
Saturday, August 25, 2018
Retirement Practice
Went to bed early to be ready for yoga, but just could not get up this morning. I decided it is OK to relax. I have barely relaxed the last 4 years, so I intend to learn.
Today we are gonna take it easy and drive the convertible over to see the golf course we will be using most down here.
Later we will go see the in laws!
Everybody have a great Saturday!
Friday, August 24, 2018
Thursday and Friday
Was so busy at work Thursday, no time to blog. Wednesday evening after work, 10 if us from work went to nice patio restaurant in our of the pretty city entertainment districts and had happy hour for J who is leaving. She started 11 years ago on very same day I started there.
Thursday worked, then we drove down to retirement house from city late. Got here midnight. Thus morning we got our new freezer delivered. We haven't had a freezer for couple of years. City freezer died and we waited to replace.
Now electricians are finishing up the kitchen lights. They replaced 5 can lights for LED with metal trim. The old plastic ones from before yellowed and put all can lights on same circuit. Also hung pendant over breakfast table on it's own. The pantry proving complication to wire, so we are adding a 6th canned light directly in front and configuring switches so that I font have to walk all the way past pantry into utility room to turn on that light.
Then they will finish lights under cabinets and ander my sink and will be finished! It already looks so much brighter!
I will post before and after monday!
Have a great Friday!
Wednesday, August 22, 2018
Oops, I Did it Again
When I write the title for the post, I sing the Britney Spears song in my head! HAHA
I looked...the fever pitch gets loud and angry and I looked. The headlines are awful. I just can't. Not while I am in an extended stay, surrounded by people living in a way that says "I don't care". No inspiration today. And then I get perspective...oh woe is me (sarcastic font). I have a husband who loves me, a roof over my head, resources, sweet doggies, friends...family. OK, I need to shrug it off. But I will say this...get that inspiration. In love, verse, nature, music...yesterday I listened to some music at work instead of podcasts. I am looking forward to starting my day over, when I need to.
The social media that I can follow (I am ignoring some) is much about summer winding down, school starting, kids growing up...time passing. Time passes really quickly. Don't stand in yesterday or tomorrow, straddling today. Enjoy today. That is my mantra this week. After all, it is already Wednesday!
Ecclesiastes 3:11
11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.
I looked...the fever pitch gets loud and angry and I looked. The headlines are awful. I just can't. Not while I am in an extended stay, surrounded by people living in a way that says "I don't care". No inspiration today. And then I get perspective...oh woe is me (sarcastic font). I have a husband who loves me, a roof over my head, resources, sweet doggies, friends...family. OK, I need to shrug it off. But I will say this...get that inspiration. In love, verse, nature, music...yesterday I listened to some music at work instead of podcasts. I am looking forward to starting my day over, when I need to.
The social media that I can follow (I am ignoring some) is much about summer winding down, school starting, kids growing up...time passing. Time passes really quickly. Don't stand in yesterday or tomorrow, straddling today. Enjoy today. That is my mantra this week. After all, it is already Wednesday!
Ecclesiastes 3:11
11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.
Tuesday, August 21, 2018
Update on the Extended Stay Saga
Rained almost 2 inches Sunday afternoon into night and was still rainy Monday morning. I have learned to walk the dog before I do hair and make up, then come in and finish getting ready for work. DH walks the boy dog separately. He is getting old and slow and does not want to walk as much as the girl. So, I walk the girl and then get ready for work.
Work was uneventful. They hired 2 more temps to work on my project, but no one mentioned to me (I work on a separate floor and its not like I see anyone on my team). My work is still steady, but we are winding down I thought. I just have no idea of the magnitude or implications. I just hope I don't have to train them. I feel like I don't know enough. I just do few very specific parts of the project.
After work, it was still rainy, so I knew I would not walk. And I was hungry and restless. So we went out to eat with our friends B & B. We go to this Asian buffet place. We used to really like it, they have suchi rolls and hibachi, typical Chinese, shrimp, prime rib, etc. But when I was having lots of issues with my tummy, I would eat various combinations to see if it helped...just sushi, just salad bar, just hibachi, just meat and veggies...even just fruit one time. Well, we have pretty much decided this place must just bathe the food in MSG. After we eat there, we feel bloated and sluggish and last night I drank 3 large glasses of water and woke up every 2 hours or so. It is crazy.
Back to the hotel saga...evidently the police did arrest a man in the hotel we are staying in...it was in the 5 and 6 oclock news stories. He had a wife and kids and checked in Sunday and when the police knocked on the door, he jumped out the 3rd floor window onto the awning below where he was shot with a police bean bag and fell on down to the ground where he was apprehended. Crazy. Oh, and this morning the elevator is broken and as I was leaving at 6:30 a man and a woman were yelling at each other because the elevator was broken and so we all have to use the side doors which require a key and sometimes don't work with a key...we gotta get out of this place!
Work was uneventful. They hired 2 more temps to work on my project, but no one mentioned to me (I work on a separate floor and its not like I see anyone on my team). My work is still steady, but we are winding down I thought. I just have no idea of the magnitude or implications. I just hope I don't have to train them. I feel like I don't know enough. I just do few very specific parts of the project.
After work, it was still rainy, so I knew I would not walk. And I was hungry and restless. So we went out to eat with our friends B & B. We go to this Asian buffet place. We used to really like it, they have suchi rolls and hibachi, typical Chinese, shrimp, prime rib, etc. But when I was having lots of issues with my tummy, I would eat various combinations to see if it helped...just sushi, just salad bar, just hibachi, just meat and veggies...even just fruit one time. Well, we have pretty much decided this place must just bathe the food in MSG. After we eat there, we feel bloated and sluggish and last night I drank 3 large glasses of water and woke up every 2 hours or so. It is crazy.
Back to the hotel saga...evidently the police did arrest a man in the hotel we are staying in...it was in the 5 and 6 oclock news stories. He had a wife and kids and checked in Sunday and when the police knocked on the door, he jumped out the 3rd floor window onto the awning below where he was shot with a police bean bag and fell on down to the ground where he was apprehended. Crazy. Oh, and this morning the elevator is broken and as I was leaving at 6:30 a man and a woman were yelling at each other because the elevator was broken and so we all have to use the side doors which require a key and sometimes don't work with a key...we gotta get out of this place!
Monday, August 20, 2018
Excitement at the Extended Stay
So we were golfing yesterday afternoon. It rained, pretty steady. We have devised strategies for keeping our hands and feet and clubs as dry as we could. We just laugh. But my 2nd BIL played with us yesterday, which is rare. He told us we were crazy.
It was nice being together, doing something silly and frivolous. It was nice being outside. The rain really cooled things off, but it was humid. The course is about 3 miles away from extended stay hotel. We heard quite a flurry of sirens. Never thought much of it.
So, we get take out on the way home. Still a very steady constant downpour. Some woman on the elevator up to our room said we missed the excitement at the hotel. Some man had been apprehended by police?! What? We could not find any news story about it. I will keep my eyes and ears open!
At 9pm last night on last dog walk of the day, there was a man with a wife and 2 children. Another rough looking man yelled and pushed him. I did not see what started this. There were about 15 people all standing by front of the hotel, besides these men and their wives (one with 2 kids). Both men were yelling and took their shirts off...the kids crying. It was scary. The woman of the aggressive man yelled him to stop "...not in front of his babies...!" DH and I were just incredulous.
I felt so bad for the kids. I just felt so upset and rattled by just seeing this. I can't imagine kids that have to live in chaos like that. I wanted to stay up and watch the news, but decided sleep was calling.
Ephesians 4:31-32 ESV
Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
It was nice being together, doing something silly and frivolous. It was nice being outside. The rain really cooled things off, but it was humid. The course is about 3 miles away from extended stay hotel. We heard quite a flurry of sirens. Never thought much of it.
So, we get take out on the way home. Still a very steady constant downpour. Some woman on the elevator up to our room said we missed the excitement at the hotel. Some man had been apprehended by police?! What? We could not find any news story about it. I will keep my eyes and ears open!
At 9pm last night on last dog walk of the day, there was a man with a wife and 2 children. Another rough looking man yelled and pushed him. I did not see what started this. There were about 15 people all standing by front of the hotel, besides these men and their wives (one with 2 kids). Both men were yelling and took their shirts off...the kids crying. It was scary. The woman of the aggressive man yelled him to stop "...not in front of his babies...!" DH and I were just incredulous.
I felt so bad for the kids. I just felt so upset and rattled by just seeing this. I can't imagine kids that have to live in chaos like that. I wanted to stay up and watch the news, but decided sleep was calling.
Ephesians 4:31-32 ESV
Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
Sunday, August 19, 2018
Dream Weekend...Staycation
Sat am we slept late, then lazy coffee. Got our hair trimmed. Were going to go out to lunch...not too hungry. So back to hotel...took my time cooked hamburger that needed to be used. Made yummy nachos with chips we needed to use and homegrown tomatoes, non dairy cheese. They were so good!
Then I got my toes and nails done (I rarely do my nails, decided to splurge). Back to hotel. DH and I decided to do matinee, we Saw The Meg 3D. It was fun, mindless way to enjoy hot summer afternoon. Then we went for a walk. Then last dog walk of the day we could see Mars very bright.
Nice day. Sunday golf. We just filled up on BIL's chicken eggs sauteed with red onion and Turkey breast. Some hot sauce. Yum, so good.
Enjoy your Sunday!
Saturday, August 18, 2018
More Shopping...NOT for Me
I bought my DGM 3 new tops yesterday and took her a yummy cookie and 4 fresh tomatoes. She is doing well. I think it made her happy.
Had a project this week that gave me anxiety for the week leading up to it. I gave a speech last night to my coffee drinker friends. It went fine. I love the reflection this project brings.
Along with the reflection comes the nerves...and body aches...and heart burn. I slept poorly all week...until last night. I slept till 10 this am! I never do that at my house, but here at hotel, I just sleep.
Much of my pain came from sitting in a poor chair at work. I made a slight adjustment in the seat angle to alleviate the pressure on my sciatic nerve (my right foot was painful and numb Monday and Tuesday). Then Wednesday and Thursday my low back was on fire.
I rarely have low back pain anymore now that I do yoga, but I have not been for 2 weeks. The anxiety caused by doing something hard is good for me. It pushes me. Makes me grow. It was a lot to gave anxiety pain and physical pain from sitting in the same week...coincidence?
Sometimes pain shapes perspective. Over time that perspective evolves into something beautiful. I believe everything that happened to me happened for a reason, softened my sharp edges and brought me to where I am now. And I am in a great place.
Have a great weekend! We are here in the city this weekend. Going to play golf tomorrow, do that is exciting.
Friday, August 17, 2018
Strategic Shopping
Now a days my shopping is very specific and planned. No more buying stuff because I am bored or looking for a quick feel good.
I bought couple things. I wanted to reeplace a pair of comfy sneakers that I have worn out. I wanted another pair of slip on comfy off white. I found some adorable Keds and they have glitter! So cute. I know I will wear them quite a bit end of summer through early fall. My DH took me with him to the sporting goods store and decided I needed a good pair of sturdy sandals for kayaking, so I picked out a pair of Keens. I have never worn anything like them. They are comfortable but make my feet look so wide. Function over looks, for these. I am sure I will get used to them.
I am going shopping here in a few minutes to pick out a couple new tops for my DGM. She is tired of all her stuff. It will perk her up a bit and I love being of service to her. She is an awesome Granny.
Any of you pick anything up lately? Good summer sales?
I bought couple things. I wanted to reeplace a pair of comfy sneakers that I have worn out. I wanted another pair of slip on comfy off white. I found some adorable Keds and they have glitter! So cute. I know I will wear them quite a bit end of summer through early fall. My DH took me with him to the sporting goods store and decided I needed a good pair of sturdy sandals for kayaking, so I picked out a pair of Keens. I have never worn anything like them. They are comfortable but make my feet look so wide. Function over looks, for these. I am sure I will get used to them.
I am going shopping here in a few minutes to pick out a couple new tops for my DGM. She is tired of all her stuff. It will perk her up a bit and I love being of service to her. She is an awesome Granny.
Any of you pick anything up lately? Good summer sales?
Thursday, August 16, 2018
My Sister Made Me This!
I am so lucky to have a window seat in my house. When we picked out this house, we loved the built ins and all the pretty trim and layout of the house. All the built-ins were already painted white, or my husband would NEVER have let me paint the wood! They were a little dingy. So, a new coat of white paint really freshened the wood up!
This window seat is in the master bed room. I don't recall the dimensions, but it is like 60+ inches. When I looked into finding a cushion for it, they were not long enough or wide enough. So, I decided I would have one custom made. Then I shopped foam - holy canoli is that stuff expensive! I had no idea! It was like $50 a foot! I did manage to snag some 50% off at Hobby Lobby. My MIL offered me a loo-see through her fabric stash and I picked this black and gold pattern because 1) she had enough, 2) it went with my other colors well enough and 3) it was FREE. OK, now to get someone to sew it for me...lucky for me, my sister sews VERY well!
She skillfully sewed this lovely cover and the bolster pillows with the piping i had picked out. She even made the cover so that it has Velcro on the bottom so the cover can be taken off and washed. DH and I just love it and brag on it any time we show some one our house.
Now I wanted to feature it to you. Have a wonderful Thursday!
This window seat is in the master bed room. I don't recall the dimensions, but it is like 60+ inches. When I looked into finding a cushion for it, they were not long enough or wide enough. So, I decided I would have one custom made. Then I shopped foam - holy canoli is that stuff expensive! I had no idea! It was like $50 a foot! I did manage to snag some 50% off at Hobby Lobby. My MIL offered me a loo-see through her fabric stash and I picked this black and gold pattern because 1) she had enough, 2) it went with my other colors well enough and 3) it was FREE. OK, now to get someone to sew it for me...lucky for me, my sister sews VERY well!
She skillfully sewed this lovely cover and the bolster pillows with the piping i had picked out. She even made the cover so that it has Velcro on the bottom so the cover can be taken off and washed. DH and I just love it and brag on it any time we show some one our house.
Now I wanted to feature it to you. Have a wonderful Thursday!
Tuesday, August 14, 2018
More Rightsizing...Still
You would think that after couple of years of purging, I would be about finished. But I am not. Now that we have everything (except what is in the hotel) moved in, we will do another sweep to get rid of extras, stuff that is too crowded and stuff we can see we won't need/use.
This past weekend I cleared out a large set of dishes my MIL gave me. I explained to her now that we have just smaller retirement house, we don't have the room. I ventured that I might see if one of nephew fiances (when they get engaged) want them, or see if neice wants it...to keep the dishes in the family. MIL seemed fine with it. I sure do hope she understands. She can see with her eyes how full we are. So, she gave her blessing anyway. And I was happy niece seemed thrilled. I took pictures and texted her. Then I packed up large microwave and toaster oven boxes and brought them back from retirement house. The old microwave (we just hate it) I will try to give away without bringing back to the city. LOL.
Anyway, my cabinets are less crowded. The timing is good because I am getting other stuff on kitchen worked out, so it is perfect. DH and I have 7 more weeks in this extended stay hotel. We are happy, because the person in the room above ours stomps around a lot, making a lot of noise. Usu starting about 10pm. Well, last night they stomped around starting at about 6pm and continued all through the entire night, DH said. I did not hear because I fell into deep sleep. Did not feel well yesterday. It was not my tummy - it was my hands and feet soreness and achey, throat sore, glands...I sure hope I am not getting sick again. DH said it is going around his work. I blame the hotel, not the most clean place exactly. It is not bad, but I am just amazed how people treat the property, not picking up after their dogs, trash overflowing the dumpster, floors dirty, weeds in the yard, cigarette butts, etc. Gross. We hope the upstairs people were up all night packing. It would be consistent with a young college aged youth waiting till last minute to be up early this am to catch shuttle to the airport.
DH and his colleagues are interviewing people for his replacement. I thinks they found the right person, but they have 2 more people to interview this am. He will not be late today getting home, so I might some errands after work. I need to go to the grocery and I have been promising my grandmother I would shop summer clearance sales for her to get couple new tops. Last night I had so many things to do and did none. I have to get a workout and errands done after work today.
Guess I better get to work. Happy (rainy) Tuesday!
This past weekend I cleared out a large set of dishes my MIL gave me. I explained to her now that we have just smaller retirement house, we don't have the room. I ventured that I might see if one of nephew fiances (when they get engaged) want them, or see if neice wants it...to keep the dishes in the family. MIL seemed fine with it. I sure do hope she understands. She can see with her eyes how full we are. So, she gave her blessing anyway. And I was happy niece seemed thrilled. I took pictures and texted her. Then I packed up large microwave and toaster oven boxes and brought them back from retirement house. The old microwave (we just hate it) I will try to give away without bringing back to the city. LOL.
Anyway, my cabinets are less crowded. The timing is good because I am getting other stuff on kitchen worked out, so it is perfect. DH and I have 7 more weeks in this extended stay hotel. We are happy, because the person in the room above ours stomps around a lot, making a lot of noise. Usu starting about 10pm. Well, last night they stomped around starting at about 6pm and continued all through the entire night, DH said. I did not hear because I fell into deep sleep. Did not feel well yesterday. It was not my tummy - it was my hands and feet soreness and achey, throat sore, glands...I sure hope I am not getting sick again. DH said it is going around his work. I blame the hotel, not the most clean place exactly. It is not bad, but I am just amazed how people treat the property, not picking up after their dogs, trash overflowing the dumpster, floors dirty, weeds in the yard, cigarette butts, etc. Gross. We hope the upstairs people were up all night packing. It would be consistent with a young college aged youth waiting till last minute to be up early this am to catch shuttle to the airport.
DH and his colleagues are interviewing people for his replacement. I thinks they found the right person, but they have 2 more people to interview this am. He will not be late today getting home, so I might some errands after work. I need to go to the grocery and I have been promising my grandmother I would shop summer clearance sales for her to get couple new tops. Last night I had so many things to do and did none. I have to get a workout and errands done after work today.
Guess I better get to work. Happy (rainy) Tuesday!
Monday, August 13, 2018
Kitchen Floors Are Finally Finished!
So happy with how they turned out. We really like them. I painted the kickplates white and the installer trimmed out with quarter round. You can see from before that the kickplates used to be dark wood color (they are made from the same wood that was laid as flooring). Since we put down the new vinyl plank and they required trim now, we decided to paint them white like cabinets and trim with white quarter round.
I think it brightens the kitchen and will be easier to keep clean.
In 2 weeks we will get our lighting done and I will post more photos....including before and after.
Have a nice Monday!
I think it brightens the kitchen and will be easier to keep clean.
In 2 weeks we will get our lighting done and I will post more photos....including before and after.
Have a nice Monday!
Friday, August 10, 2018
Are We More Divided?
Wooooo weeeee, been busy at work!
Was thinking about my last post...
Are we more divided than ever? Is this a narrative that the media promotes so sell more ads? I don't know. When we look back in history, it sure seems that mankind has been divided since we got here.
I do know this, money and corruption are making it seem worse. With all the info sources one is bombarded with on a daily basis, it is easier and harder to follow the money. My take away is that motives need to be constantly weighed. If I don't know for sure, I just try to pray and think positive.
Hope you all are having a positive day! I found a couple cool podcasts, new to me: Southern Gothic and Maybe It's You.
I will do an entire post on podcasts soon. I love many!
Wednesday, August 8, 2018
I Try Not to Watch the News
I am not in Chicago, but another similar Midwestern city. And, like Chicago we have had a recent spate of shootings. I absolutely WILL NOT talk politics on this blog or any of my social media. In fact, i really don't like to discuss it at all - it seems like the current 2 party system we have in America is dividing us more than ever.
Yesterday was voting day. Yet, after work I walked 5 miles and then went home and fixed us smoothies, showered and fell asleep without watching the results. It is a scary time in our nation and in the world. When I watch or listen to too much news, I get really negative and consumed with worry. Worry is something I have plenty of naturally. So I instead focus on the positive (the helpers, as Mr. Rogers said) and I try to pay attention just enough to know the issues and be informed.
I feel sadness for the old people, the people who fought for what freedoms we cherish and I feel bad for the young people and the disadvantaged. The helpless animals. And then I remind myself that God is in charge.
As with things that happen in one's individual life...I do believe the things that are happening all around us are happening for a reason. So, I try to focus on the similarities. I feel better when I smile at a stranger who seemed rude, maybe they are having a really challenging issue in their life. The person who cut me off, maybe they are dealing with something bad. The person who disappointed me - maybe it had nothing to do with me at all.
I am not a big believer in astrology or stuff like that, but I did find this interesting. Friday the 27th was a blood moon and supposedly the last week or so we were supposed to be able to see Mars clearly (we can't here in the city - the sky is too bright from lights). DH is way more pragmatic than I in such matter (no way he would even give it a 2nd thought). However, DH was a cop many years ago and he swore (as do first responders, ER doctors/nurses and teachers) that when there was a full moon - they know by peoples' collective behavior. So, what does that mean? I don't know. The moon does control the tide, after all.
Anyway, here is a little snippet I read about Mars retrograde:
..."Pisces and Pisces Ascendant: All Mars retrograde cycles affect you in the areas of personal finances, income, possessions, comfort, and values. These areas might be ambiguous now, or cause for concern and anxiety for the time being. Reassessing these matters becomes necessary. This is a good time for taking a hard look at your budget. It’s also a time for understanding how the management of your personal resources impacts your confidence in general."
-credit to Astrology Café
This is funny to me because we are 1) living in an extended stay hotel and 2) we have 2 meetings with 2 different financial advisors. Do I ascribe some power to this? No, not actively. Maybe passive interest. Anyway, have a Wonderful Wednesday everyone!
Yesterday was voting day. Yet, after work I walked 5 miles and then went home and fixed us smoothies, showered and fell asleep without watching the results. It is a scary time in our nation and in the world. When I watch or listen to too much news, I get really negative and consumed with worry. Worry is something I have plenty of naturally. So I instead focus on the positive (the helpers, as Mr. Rogers said) and I try to pay attention just enough to know the issues and be informed.
I feel sadness for the old people, the people who fought for what freedoms we cherish and I feel bad for the young people and the disadvantaged. The helpless animals. And then I remind myself that God is in charge.
As with things that happen in one's individual life...I do believe the things that are happening all around us are happening for a reason. So, I try to focus on the similarities. I feel better when I smile at a stranger who seemed rude, maybe they are having a really challenging issue in their life. The person who cut me off, maybe they are dealing with something bad. The person who disappointed me - maybe it had nothing to do with me at all.
I am not a big believer in astrology or stuff like that, but I did find this interesting. Friday the 27th was a blood moon and supposedly the last week or so we were supposed to be able to see Mars clearly (we can't here in the city - the sky is too bright from lights). DH is way more pragmatic than I in such matter (no way he would even give it a 2nd thought). However, DH was a cop many years ago and he swore (as do first responders, ER doctors/nurses and teachers) that when there was a full moon - they know by peoples' collective behavior. So, what does that mean? I don't know. The moon does control the tide, after all.
Anyway, here is a little snippet I read about Mars retrograde:
..."Pisces and Pisces Ascendant: All Mars retrograde cycles affect you in the areas of personal finances, income, possessions, comfort, and values. These areas might be ambiguous now, or cause for concern and anxiety for the time being. Reassessing these matters becomes necessary. This is a good time for taking a hard look at your budget. It’s also a time for understanding how the management of your personal resources impacts your confidence in general."
-credit to Astrology Café
This is funny to me because we are 1) living in an extended stay hotel and 2) we have 2 meetings with 2 different financial advisors. Do I ascribe some power to this? No, not actively. Maybe passive interest. Anyway, have a Wonderful Wednesday everyone!
Tuesday, August 7, 2018
Allergies
Even though we are getting a nice soaking rain after a thunderstorm last night, my allergies are really bad. I started feeling the dry eye, sinus headaches mid week last week. Sunday, Monday and today I can add in stomach issues. I looked up the chart on the internet for allergens and no wonder!
On top of allergy season (spring and especially fall, for me) I was anxious to hear some bad news and struggling family members, then the trip to the lake and back home so late (I barely ate anything that sets me off)...even though I slept late Sunday, it is all catching up with me. Monday I felt horrible. I went home after work and went to bed. DH ordered Chinese food and I sipped some soup. I got a good rest, no walk last night. I am going to eat very light today, see of I can be gentle with my system.
I know we need the rain and maybe that will help. Then allergies back to high tomorrow as we go into ragweed season, which is bad for me. I know it is just temporary. At least I will lose some weight, so there is that! When allergens are high, my autoimmune goes into high gear. I have tried allergy medicine, but not much helps my tummy with the allergen irritation. About the only thing I can do is eat well, rest and moderate exercise. It will last about 2 weeks. I don't really have the weight to lose this summer, so I am praying it is not too bad this season.
Do any of you have late summer/fall allergies? Spring? Any of you notice a coinciding gastrointestinal dysfunction? Any remedies you can think of. I try to do lots of whole foods, soups, broths and smoothies. Maybe I will crockpot a chicken over the weekend at Retirement Home and get some good old fashioned bone broth, rich in collagen and sip on it all next week. Sitting here thinking about trying some Kombucha.
Have a great Tuesday!
On top of allergy season (spring and especially fall, for me) I was anxious to hear some bad news and struggling family members, then the trip to the lake and back home so late (I barely ate anything that sets me off)...even though I slept late Sunday, it is all catching up with me. Monday I felt horrible. I went home after work and went to bed. DH ordered Chinese food and I sipped some soup. I got a good rest, no walk last night. I am going to eat very light today, see of I can be gentle with my system.
I know we need the rain and maybe that will help. Then allergies back to high tomorrow as we go into ragweed season, which is bad for me. I know it is just temporary. At least I will lose some weight, so there is that! When allergens are high, my autoimmune goes into high gear. I have tried allergy medicine, but not much helps my tummy with the allergen irritation. About the only thing I can do is eat well, rest and moderate exercise. It will last about 2 weeks. I don't really have the weight to lose this summer, so I am praying it is not too bad this season.
Do any of you have late summer/fall allergies? Spring? Any of you notice a coinciding gastrointestinal dysfunction? Any remedies you can think of. I try to do lots of whole foods, soups, broths and smoothies. Maybe I will crockpot a chicken over the weekend at Retirement Home and get some good old fashioned bone broth, rich in collagen and sip on it all next week. Sitting here thinking about trying some Kombucha.
Have a great Tuesday!
Monday, August 6, 2018
Back from a Quick Lake Trip
If you want only one thing too much, it’s likely to turn out a disappointment. The only healthy way to live, as I see it, is to learn to like all the little everyday things.”
~Lonesome Dove
We drove down to the lake for the day Saturday. We considered spending the night, but my friends had a houseful and our dogs were pretty stressed out. Also, I was wide awake because I tried some of the Mio Energy - whew! That stuff is crazy. I don't do a lot of caffeine. I was wide awake at 11:30. Our dogs did better than we thought around the 2 big dogs that were there, but I just worried about them barking during the night. But we were really glad we went and got to spend time with our friends. I have known the 2 guys since I was in grade school and one of their wives since high school and I just really cherish such friendships. And I am really happy to see Allen enjoy them and hang out with the guys. DH does not have a big circle of friends. In fact, he only has his family and 1 friend from grade school that died few years ago. I respect that he is more reserved, but it is different for me. I used to confuse quantity with quality.
I used to think it was just a disadvantage to have few friends. But people can really disappoint sometimes and DH does not let very many close enough to disappoint him. He is coming around and I am becoming less extroverted. We are finding a happy medium, I think. I am becoming more choosy about what influence and personalities and values I want around me and he is becoming willing to meet people. I think we become more choosy about friends with age naturally, but I also think I feel much better about solitude than I did when I was younger. Therefore, if I am going to spend time with others and give up some of my solitude, it will be with people that I really respect and value. For me, that is a very good thing to weigh my solitude.
We did enjoy some time with just our 3 friends before the neighbors and other company arrived Saturday. That was nice. I enjoy our talks.
T is a nurse. She and I both feel we have the problem solver role in many family and friends interactions. our spouses are more reserved. She said she sees the positive in someone until they prove her wrong, while J her husband is the opposite. I feel the same way. DH does not accept or trust someone until they earn it. I accept someone and give them a chance, until they disappoint me. Then i walk away. And when I walk away, I don't look back. While I see the positive approach of T and myself, it can lead to unmet expectations and disappointment. I also think i have walked away too easily before, or at unrealistic expectations. However, it is my nature and it is hard to change. While caregivers can get positive energy from helping others, we can also become very drained from people. This weekend I was feeling very drained before I went to the lake. The last few years I have felt very drained.
At a time in my life I should feel the opposite, I am feeling heaviness of people around me who are having hard times. I have had heavy times in my life and have had people prop me up. So I want to return that valuable gift to others. But not at the expense of my own sanity. I have not yet figured out how to reconcile this - so, I will continue to explore this...But some of what I have come to learn is that the help and support I offer others has to come with no strings. I spend time judging why they are in the situation they are in, what they did, what they could do different, or compare myself to them. Of course, some people are in situations that are totally out of their control - but I feel this actually pretty rare. We make a lot of choices. I need to do less judging and comparing. If I can give freely of myself with pure motives then I will do that. I have had people ask me for advise or resources and then not do what they said they would do, not do what I advised or I have given resources to someone who did not use it wisely. That leads me down a dark path. I will give unconditionally, or not give and just pray.
Unconditional love is a theme that keeps coming back to me, especially the last couple years. I think I am starting to look through that lens to understand my past and help me define my boundaries. If I gave unconditional love, like my creator gave me...and that is all I know to do. Try to reflect that.
I know this is rambling...and I have much more to explore on this...and I will. Thanks for reading. I hope someone will chime in. Have a wonderful Monday.
~Lonesome Dove
We drove down to the lake for the day Saturday. We considered spending the night, but my friends had a houseful and our dogs were pretty stressed out. Also, I was wide awake because I tried some of the Mio Energy - whew! That stuff is crazy. I don't do a lot of caffeine. I was wide awake at 11:30. Our dogs did better than we thought around the 2 big dogs that were there, but I just worried about them barking during the night. But we were really glad we went and got to spend time with our friends. I have known the 2 guys since I was in grade school and one of their wives since high school and I just really cherish such friendships. And I am really happy to see Allen enjoy them and hang out with the guys. DH does not have a big circle of friends. In fact, he only has his family and 1 friend from grade school that died few years ago. I respect that he is more reserved, but it is different for me. I used to confuse quantity with quality.
I used to think it was just a disadvantage to have few friends. But people can really disappoint sometimes and DH does not let very many close enough to disappoint him. He is coming around and I am becoming less extroverted. We are finding a happy medium, I think. I am becoming more choosy about what influence and personalities and values I want around me and he is becoming willing to meet people. I think we become more choosy about friends with age naturally, but I also think I feel much better about solitude than I did when I was younger. Therefore, if I am going to spend time with others and give up some of my solitude, it will be with people that I really respect and value. For me, that is a very good thing to weigh my solitude.
We did enjoy some time with just our 3 friends before the neighbors and other company arrived Saturday. That was nice. I enjoy our talks.
T is a nurse. She and I both feel we have the problem solver role in many family and friends interactions. our spouses are more reserved. She said she sees the positive in someone until they prove her wrong, while J her husband is the opposite. I feel the same way. DH does not accept or trust someone until they earn it. I accept someone and give them a chance, until they disappoint me. Then i walk away. And when I walk away, I don't look back. While I see the positive approach of T and myself, it can lead to unmet expectations and disappointment. I also think i have walked away too easily before, or at unrealistic expectations. However, it is my nature and it is hard to change. While caregivers can get positive energy from helping others, we can also become very drained from people. This weekend I was feeling very drained before I went to the lake. The last few years I have felt very drained.
At a time in my life I should feel the opposite, I am feeling heaviness of people around me who are having hard times. I have had heavy times in my life and have had people prop me up. So I want to return that valuable gift to others. But not at the expense of my own sanity. I have not yet figured out how to reconcile this - so, I will continue to explore this...But some of what I have come to learn is that the help and support I offer others has to come with no strings. I spend time judging why they are in the situation they are in, what they did, what they could do different, or compare myself to them. Of course, some people are in situations that are totally out of their control - but I feel this actually pretty rare. We make a lot of choices. I need to do less judging and comparing. If I can give freely of myself with pure motives then I will do that. I have had people ask me for advise or resources and then not do what they said they would do, not do what I advised or I have given resources to someone who did not use it wisely. That leads me down a dark path. I will give unconditionally, or not give and just pray.
Unconditional love is a theme that keeps coming back to me, especially the last couple years. I think I am starting to look through that lens to understand my past and help me define my boundaries. If I gave unconditional love, like my creator gave me...and that is all I know to do. Try to reflect that.
I know this is rambling...and I have much more to explore on this...and I will. Thanks for reading. I hope someone will chime in. Have a wonderful Monday.
Friday, August 3, 2018
My Friends, N and T
I just learned yesterday that my friend N from grade school has cancer. Pancreatic cancer. I sat and cried silent tears at my desk at work. Big hot heavy tears.
On the other hand, a friend of mine who did a very bad thing when he was young. He has been in prison 30 years. he is getting released this October. One of my friends involved in this group text yesterday about N's cancer, told us about T sort of as a way of saying "here is some good news too". T needs prayers too, to help him deal with life outside of prison. Lord help me carry these burdens.
Mark 9:23: Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth.
On the other hand, a friend of mine who did a very bad thing when he was young. He has been in prison 30 years. he is getting released this October. One of my friends involved in this group text yesterday about N's cancer, told us about T sort of as a way of saying "here is some good news too". T needs prayers too, to help him deal with life outside of prison. Lord help me carry these burdens.
Mark 9:23: Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth.
Thursday, August 2, 2018
Planning
When I though of how nice it was going to be go sell our City House, I thought it would be such a relief, that would carry us through the 3 months at the extended stay. It carried me through one month. And as of tomorrow, we have exactly 8 weeks left. But, we have made it through 5 and a half weeks at the hotel. At least we have had no more fire alarms! At least, that I know of. I almost hate leaving my dogs there while we are gone to work. They seem to be doing fine though. At least once a day, we take a pretty leisurely walk with them and they love all the sniffing.
Yesterday after work, we met with a retirement advisor. DH wanted to go to him, because he has experience working with people with government pensions. In my opinion, he is nice but a little rough around the edges and made a couple of errors that bothered me. He did spend time talking directly to me, which I appreciated. Some sales people just glance at me, like I am just the sweet little wife and then focus on talking to DH, which I don't appreciate. But, this guy is, after all - a salesman. And he is trying to sell us his service. I also appreciate that, I am not naïve. But he spent at least part of his presentation knocking the investment vehicle I was already in. I went home and reviewed my investments, and feel like he was partly correct and partly oversimplified. But, mainly when I am considering whether to use someone else, I just want to know what you offer, not bash where I am now. I think DH and I are on the same page. So, we are meeting with my guy next week.
The thing that I think most beneficial of all to DH, was having this 3rd party tell DH that we have done a good job (saving, no debts and paying off our house) and that we are in a fine position to retire. DH deferred all the praise to me - but I really am proud of DH. His diligent hard work, his income, his generosity with me, his trust in me and our work we have done together. More on this later, but we have only been together for 13 years. When I met DH, he was not in great shape financially. When we talked about marriage 11 year ago, I told him I had a few deal breakers. I told him what they were, and he readily agreed to use my approach to finances. And here we are 13 years later - in a position to retire. Not near the income we have now - but we can have a modest retirement and spend some time with each other and if we continue to hone our lifestyle, we can make this work. I will go into this more later, in another post. I gotta get to work today.
But, before I go...back to the hotel. It is really getting old, but I like the way DH and I can laugh about it and prop each other up, when we need it. This weekend, we are going to the lake (where I grew up) to see some friends of mine. They were here back in May when he buried his mother. He has been working on her lake house, painting and cleaning it out. I can't wait to see it. They admired my painting skills from Retirement Home. We are going to take the dogs and spend Sat evening. It will be fun. It will be great to get out of the hotel. It will be a 3 hour drive, instead of 4. haha
The weather is finally starting to be lower that the high 90's. I have been walking still and I did hot yoga last night without my friend, T. She pulled a muscle. We are going to walk tonight. That will be fun to catch up.
Have a wonderful Thursday!
Yesterday after work, we met with a retirement advisor. DH wanted to go to him, because he has experience working with people with government pensions. In my opinion, he is nice but a little rough around the edges and made a couple of errors that bothered me. He did spend time talking directly to me, which I appreciated. Some sales people just glance at me, like I am just the sweet little wife and then focus on talking to DH, which I don't appreciate. But, this guy is, after all - a salesman. And he is trying to sell us his service. I also appreciate that, I am not naïve. But he spent at least part of his presentation knocking the investment vehicle I was already in. I went home and reviewed my investments, and feel like he was partly correct and partly oversimplified. But, mainly when I am considering whether to use someone else, I just want to know what you offer, not bash where I am now. I think DH and I are on the same page. So, we are meeting with my guy next week.
The thing that I think most beneficial of all to DH, was having this 3rd party tell DH that we have done a good job (saving, no debts and paying off our house) and that we are in a fine position to retire. DH deferred all the praise to me - but I really am proud of DH. His diligent hard work, his income, his generosity with me, his trust in me and our work we have done together. More on this later, but we have only been together for 13 years. When I met DH, he was not in great shape financially. When we talked about marriage 11 year ago, I told him I had a few deal breakers. I told him what they were, and he readily agreed to use my approach to finances. And here we are 13 years later - in a position to retire. Not near the income we have now - but we can have a modest retirement and spend some time with each other and if we continue to hone our lifestyle, we can make this work. I will go into this more later, in another post. I gotta get to work today.
But, before I go...back to the hotel. It is really getting old, but I like the way DH and I can laugh about it and prop each other up, when we need it. This weekend, we are going to the lake (where I grew up) to see some friends of mine. They were here back in May when he buried his mother. He has been working on her lake house, painting and cleaning it out. I can't wait to see it. They admired my painting skills from Retirement Home. We are going to take the dogs and spend Sat evening. It will be fun. It will be great to get out of the hotel. It will be a 3 hour drive, instead of 4. haha
The weather is finally starting to be lower that the high 90's. I have been walking still and I did hot yoga last night without my friend, T. She pulled a muscle. We are going to walk tonight. That will be fun to catch up.
Have a wonderful Thursday!
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