Am I Overthinking? Day 30

Probably.   Maybe this is a pattern.  Maybe it is progress, because I am trying like heck not to consider myself center of the universe.   Trying to think of others...

Really would like help on this...What do you think?  Have similar experience?  How did you handle?

One of my childhood friends has terminal cancer.  Saturday, in our hometown about 2.5 hours away, there is a fund raiser for him.  My sister and I are going.  I have a couple other friends who are going.  We all live south.  2 of us gals said "Oh, let's ride together...!" Friend 1 says if we take your big SUV, we will chip in for gas.   I thought it would be fun.  Then DH tells me it will be a pain to remove the tarp he has put down for "carpet" and load the rear 3rd row seat, but he will help me.

Then I texted the one friend about a week ago to ask what time we should leave...she did not answer the time question...talked about couple other things...This is partly the problem with texting, I know, I know...

Then Thursday she calls and leaves a message that she and her husband sold a washer/dryer and have to go to storage unit on the way.  This is in the town they just moved from about halfway.  Friend 2 still lives in that town.   Asked if that was ok, or if I prefer to just take 2 vehs...leaves that message.

I think she has to know, I would not care at all.  I have a garage full of her sister's shoes I am trying to sell to help her and sister.  Would I mind such a minor detour?  Then it occurred to me...maybe other friend voiced that they would just prefer to make arrangements...I dont know, it just seemed weird to me.  A month ago these 2 friends went to a concert and only invited me last minute, when her mom had to miss to care for her ailing spouse.  I did not go, because of my dogs.  DH was deer hunting.  Of course, a month before that I mentioned I was going to go deer hunting with DH.  So that could be why I was not invited to concert earlier.

I text and give her an "out".  I tell her to call.  She does not call.  This morning I get a group text all 3 of us.  Friend 3 asking about meeting.  I reply saying friend 1 and I had brief chat, arrangements not finalized, etc.  Send photo of buried SUV 3rd row seat.  Tell friend 1 to call...several hours have gone by.

I asked DH about tomorrow, he suggested I just go with my sister in separate car and not deal with the situation.   Because there is no way for me to know.  I would rather err on the side of saying, no big deal, we will all meet there.  Than wonder if the girl doesn't really want to be around me and feel uncomfortable.

This summer us 3 gals were on group text and friend 2 said she was going to be in my city for a conference.  I was surprisingly hopeful...then as the evening progressed, I texted her and she never answered.  I thought it was rude, but I said nothing to her or friend 1.

These 2 friends were here back in September,  when we went to see pup we adopted week later.  I did mention to friend 3 and friend 4.  They did not really understand how to interpret friend 2 ignoring me either.  But I should not make assumptions.  They both ssid I should have a talk with her about it.  I may.  But it should be done in person.  And this fundraiser weekend is NOT the time.  This friend 2 who ignored my text is the one who took my cat and also the one I gave all my furniture to in the city (couch, love seat, chair ottoman).  They did come pick it up, granted.  But they did it on a weekend we were gone.

Even if I am overthinking.  I just prefer not to work so hard.  I have found true friendship to be not so much work.  That people who want to see you, see you.  I am not wiling to spend precious energy here.

Now, what to do about it.  My work buddy back in the city...he called it the "drift".  He "drifted" away from many family and friends when he moved from West coast city to 200 acres in the Midwest.  I think I will start there...I can always talk later.

Beautiful day again today.  Spend some time outdoors again.  Have a great Friday!

Today I am grateful for my serenity and my tools.  I can pick up my toys and go to another sandbox.  Give it some time before I do anything.  Namaste my friends out there!  I appreciate you!